In the Saddle

Dog complexes and crazy parents…

So, remember how I told y’all that Jessa’s orange fur was turning white, hence the vet thinking she’s actually older than we thought? Well, her once-orange little face mask around her eyes is now almost completely white. And, where we once got regular, “oh! Is that a puppy!?!?” questions from people on the street, now we get “oh, this must be an old Beagle!” Like, a lot.

We’re trying to keep our girl young at heart…but all these idiots keep talking about how old she is! Poor little gal. She’ll always be a pup to me.

Kind of related: I took Jess for a very long walk on Saturday, because it was so beautiful. She accompanied me to the hardware store (which is next to a Petco, so they let people bring their dogs in…nice!) and up and down a block where, much to her delight, someone had spilled a whole bunch of popcorn. There was a lot of dragging and plenty of “No!”s on that stretch.

Anyway, we came across a couple with their young toddler in a stroller. They were older parents, looked to be in their early 40s, and I shit you not, it was like an SNL parody. The dude sounded like Will Farrell and the woman like Ana Gasteyer or something…talking in high baby voices, very very slowly…like, “[kid’s name] DO - YOU - WANT - TO - PET - THE - DOG - GY? DO - YOU? SEE? NICE - DOG - GY!! NIIIIIICE!!” They actually never really acknowledged me or spoke to me in any way…it was all about the kid and all in this overly careful, overly dramatized manner. It was actually half SNL and half Parker Posey and Michael Hitchcock’s weimereiner-owning, J.Crew-sporting couple in Best in Show. I just kind of stood there, like, is this actually happening?

As I walked away, I thought, pleeeease don’t let me ever parent like that. Kids are people, too. Jeeez!